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The Party is over

July 2, 2012

Hi Everybody,

Being in LA for the last week has been kind of surreal.  We’ve gone to museums, had dinner with old friends, and generally have been in vacation mode.  Except for the daily morning visits to COH for outpatient Fludarabine and little fatigue and nausea, this whole thing has been like a holiday.  The PICC line in my right upper arm is a constant reminder of what it is really about.

Today I get admitted to the hospital into solitary confinement.  I start some bigger chemotherapeutic meds and the fatigue and nausea factors will probably escalate.  I need to figure what to bring.  Pictures of the family, a painting done by my mom, a couple surgical scrub pants, robe, slippers, electronics, and books.  I’m walking into this with some background knowledge of the disease and what medical complications are around the corner but I’m not up on how to keep my sanity and maximize my “health” like food, yoga, physical therapy, and other amenities the hospital offers.  I’m approaching this as a “need to know and learn as you go”.   I’m sure there will be a lot of support and suggestions from the hospital staff.  This is definitely a road well-traveled.   Doesn’t a “low bacteria diet” just wet your appetite?  Sound like something you can really sink your teeth into.  I can’t wait!

All are welcomed to call, write, email, and even visit if you find yourself in not so beautiful Duarte.  Everybody has been very supportive and understanding.  I must admit  that I have had my moments where I’m just a lump on the log but in general I’m trying to keep an optimistic attitude.

For the timid, you might want to skip this next paragraph, it’s kind of gross and graphic.  Last night I had a dream where my computer was hacked and all my important data was liquefying but the image was of my abdominal cavity turning to jelly.  You think my subconscious is telling me that I’m a little anxious and not quite at peace with this whole thing?

Life is what happens as we make plans and the unexpected can be a challenge.




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  1. laura maslon permalink

    we’re rooting for you. you write so beautifully. not sure what to say except to say we love you. laura and jim

  2. howard eddy permalink

    going to have to clean up my vocabulary with everyone reading this crap..oops, I mean stuff. best to you jim and claire. we will be sending out healing thoughts for you. love ,surfer spike

  3. Chip Goldeen permalink

    Dear Jim,

    Do you have an Apple iPad? If not you should really consider getting one. It is a great lightweight device to keep you busy in bed or while sitting in a chair. It has great apps where you can read books, all the newspapers (even the Santa Cruz Sentinel), magazines and websites. You can do your e-mails, and any internet viewing. If you like baseball, MLB at Bat is a great app where you can watch games live. You can also watch TV shows and movies on Netflix, or from iTunes on it. I use the iPad constantly while on all of the various airplane trips I have to make each month and it really helps pass the time. You can even look at the surf cams in Santa Cruz! I am so sorry you are having to go through this ordeal—but, I am glad you are on the road to getting healthy again. You have always been there for us to stay healthy, now it is our turn to help you get healthy. If it was in your family and friends power we would just “snap our fingers” and you would be well.

    Your Buddy,


  4. Brent Welling permalink

    In six months I hope you will be saying the same thing hip transplant recipients always say: if I had known it was that easy I would have done it years ago.
    Keep on keeping on!

  5. Esther Levandoski permalink

    We are thinking of you and wishing you all the best for a successful treatment and complete cure.

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